will this be a problem??

i dunno why i always get a problem with my social realtionship. i think i would say that i'm the most anti social creature in this world.. i don't have too much friends, well, im bothered at first but then as time goes by, i'm trying to deal with it. i'm trying to deal with my loneliness. and luckily its workin, i don't give a fuck to everything. even when it makes me cry, or hurt. nah... i don't wanna care, not ever.

and one day, when i got a  boyfriend, i just confused. i've declared that i'm the most anti-social creature in this world, and my boyfriend is really on my opposite, he got a lot of friends. and the problem was...

u guys know an anti social creature doesn't hang out much, rite. and that surely makes me so poor in dressing.. rite??? now u know a guy like him like to hang out a lot rite????????

now u combine the two different creature like us, and what will u get???????????

got it?? i don't wanna change to a 'normal' human by hangin out and put some make-up and dress like a poor girl where ur butt is almost visible to everyone, walk with boy with hands hold to each other and kissing in the whole nite?? no thanks... and otherwise, i don't wanna make em like me.. an anti-social.guy. i don't wanna change everyone. to be honest... i never care about everything.. and i mean it, if  i should broke with him, its not a matter, i don't even care if i die.i feel NUMB. i never felt pain anymore, i feel sad no more. i don't feel anything. I MEAN IT!!!

(oh well, okay.. calm down, girl)

 in this moment, i almost like a selfish anti social girl.. oh God... 

well, i don't wanna change, at least, i haven't....